A virtual perch fishing expedition on behalf of the perchmaster

What do you do after a week of catching lots of walleyes, pike, and trout? We were tired of being frustrated by curious but non-aggressive musky. My son Shawn and I had an idea on Friday. We are told that the perchmaster had a very sad story regarding his 2013 absence at VBL. We decided to be kind and allow him to live vicariously through us. We have been trying to convince Gord that there is a market for virtual fishing when guests like the perchmaster are unable to visit. We knew that only one thing could please this frequent VBL guest…a sink full of perch. But could it be done in August? Kurt is convinced that this is only a spring phenomenon. He wasn’t impressed with our results last year, so it was time to try again.


Shawn could hardly contain himself as he anticipated a day of perch fishing in the perchmaster’s secret spot. Could today be the day? It was like all the rest…hot, sunny and very little wind (I never broke out a jacket or rain coat). It turns out we had the spot all to ourselves.

Now Gord had prepared some special towels for the perchmaster and his partner-in-crime Mark, but they went unclaimed this year. We decided to put them to use after hunting down the elusive bull perch.

Shawn wore his VBL perch towel with pride with the first bull perch. Can I join the party? Most certainly. I flew that perch flag with dignity.

It was a grueling day catching and sorting, but the inevitable was about to occur. We were out of bait. Time to bring a smile to Gord’s face.

Gord doesn’t appear to be as pleased as Shawn. Maybe that had something to do with Shawn being an observer and Gord being the fillet master?

The fact of the matter is that a sink full of 50 perch is a pretty sight. We hope that the perchmaster enjoyed this virtual fishing adventure and are hopeful that he has mailed Gord his check for the experience? Now the perchmaster will likely whine that we should have filled it up with another 50 “dinks” but that’s not the way we roll. We left a few for them to catch this next spring.

 

13 thoughts on “A virtual perch fishing expedition on behalf of the perchmaster

  1. Well Andy your right on one thing. If you would not have I would have said it.
    Where are the other 50?
    But props you have learned well and think you might in line for being in the “BULL PERCH FEST”
    Loks like a few nice ones in the pics.
    The question I would like to know how are the worms this time of year?
    Anglers may start to flock to VBL for Bull Perch soon.
    Maybe if I retire from my shit job maybe Gord will hire me for perch guiding….
    Nice job Andy and Shawn

  2. Kurt,

    I think Gord could use a good perch guide. Don’t get me wrong, this economy sucks and there are a lot people doing what they have to do to get by. I wish you the best of luck in balancing your work with pleasure in 2014. As for the flukes or black spot disease (referred to as Uvulifer ambloplitis by the professor), it wasn’t bad. Some of them had it, some of them didn’t. As you know, it is perfectly safe to eat them assuming you don’t like perch sushi. Perchmaster….here is a little known fact. You should always freeze your fish before pickling (zero degrees for at least two days). Pickling does not kill all larvae, and some of these larvae result in broad fish tapeworm infection.

  3. Andy, I must admit you hold higher standards than the Perchmaster. You’re perch filleting skills aren’t too shabby either. You’ve set the bar high for Kurt. Can he take up the challenge? I’m afraid that years of underachieving may be hard for him to shake off. Let’s see what 2014 brings….

  4. Gord, the perchmaster has plenty of time to prepare for 2014. He could designate it “the Year of VBL” and begin training now. I am envisioning something like the movie Rocky….punching a side of beef, and running up and down stairs and thrusting his fists in the air. That’s the level of training that will be required to get him back into competition shape. I think he could be up for the challenge. But you know us….we will probably find a good reason why this can’t work.

  5. Gord
    You should be so lucky to have me on your staff!!!!
    I would be a great addition. Maybe a thought we go partners on this camp I happen to know another Curt that we could use as a guide during hunting season but I’m not sure how good his skills are yet….

    1. Well, there’s a nearby lodge that’s for sale. You could run mini-van trips up from Wisconsin for bull perch adventures. I believe the “other” Curt knows the lodge, as they stayed there for a deer hunt. Just think of the FUN!

  6. Curt,

    Gord continues to mock those that enjoy fishing for perch. I think he is also envious of another lodge owner that recently attracted a partner who brought a wheel barrow of cash. He clearly is unaware of the market captured by Devils Lake in North Dakota. See: woodlandresort.com
    I have not done this “perch express” train trip but will do it some day. The professor is too much of a pussy to do an ice fishing trip.

    I think the problem with your proposal is that as his partner you would be delegated to the fillet table to take care of all the happy perch anglers, to unplug toilets, to secure cigarettes in secret for the professor when he is visiting with the missus, to clean Gord’s chaps for a venture into the sauna, and to deal with all of the guests that follow this blog. You think your current job sucks? Try putting up with us for a summer.

    1. Thank you Andy, for that succinct description of my job. One correction: chaps are optional in the sauna….a tight fitting “ball cap” is recommended for the men.

    2. Andy
      I’m Kurt with a K the other Curt also known as bad Curt is with a C.
      That perch train trip sounds like fun. I know a few that have said it a fun trip. I srill think tge frer lodging at VBL in March would be fun. I’m at a disadvantage here typing on my phone as I am getting ready for my bear hunt in the morning.

      1. Kurt,

        I hope the bear hunting went better than the typing? For the rest of the VBL fans, “srill tge frer lodging” is the newest Norwegian trend in perch fishing trips.

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